so i just sent someone a very unpleasant message because they have completely lost track of something of mine i lent to them a few years ago that is difficult to replace. it felt good but it probably wasn't a nice thing to do and it's made me think a lot about what i consider to be acceptable lending practises. i mean, it's not great to give something back to someone after a long period of time but at least if you know where it is the sin of belated return is forgiven, right?
anyway, lending chat away.
i've lent numerous dvds to friends, then a few months later when i ask for it back they're all like ''what? you never lent that to us''. So long John Saffran VS God and Miami Ink Season 1
I will always try and return something to someone no matter what length of time. Having said that I hate lending stuff to anyone.
I have lost so many books this way, Well, that and leaving them at fuzzy's house, which is like a black hole...
Can I PLEASE have my entire 6 season box set of Six Feet Under back now?
Also my dodgy chinese Stanley Kubrick box set containing ALL of his films!
you gave them what now?!
I've lost so many books because I've lent them out and I sometimes get pretty upset about it. Neither a borrower nor a lender be, etc.
I don't mind lending to certain people.
I also have a blanket policy of not lending games to anyone after an incident in primary school involving a NES cart.
I still have a copy of The Politics of Ecstasy that this mad hippie guy I knew at uni lent me – he want to take me frolicking through forests on acid or some shit – so that is my one crime in this area.
*wanted
Actually i still have someone's copy of Kitchen Confidential.
Some stuff is so long ago that you stop caring about it. Like my signed Nick Cave CDs I loaned to a friend in 1993. I'd seriously feel like a jerk asking for them back now.
i should probably take this opportunity to apologise for all the stuff i'm being lax about returning. i know where it is and i'm working on getting it back to you, promise. which is more than aforementioned person who stole my stuff did.
Oh God - so do I!
Yeah, a huge proportion of my stuff.
For the last few years I've kept a list, dated, contextualised etc (eg X came round at 5pm on y/x/zz and borrowed p,q,and r subsequent to conversation on Z). I don't directly ask for things back unless I need them, but I know where they are, and if I want my stuff back and you don't have it, you're replacing it, and if you lie about having it, OOHH watch out!
I'm terrible at both lending and borrowing. I think this comes for being raised in a big family, where nothing is really ''yours''.
I'm terrible at giving back books and clothes, but equally bad at keeping track of stuff lent.
My other half is the complete opposite. (only child) If I lend a dvd to a friend, he's very aware of how long they have had it. I'm more of a meh... unless its a treasure of mine.
the best part is when you lend something to someone and then THEY lend it to someone else and then that person loses it. i love it when that happens.
I'm actually quite ticked because I lent my darkroom equipment to a friends brother who was taking a photography course. I saved my McDonalds money as a teen to get that stuff!
But I'm only really aware of how much I miss it because I kinda what to get back into photography.
i should have probably asked said person to replace to hard-to-replace stuff, but he's a bit of a stoner waster and it would be like getting money out of a melted icecream in the shape of a fiver.
I don't lend media, but I'll copy it.
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Hi rigid - this is my first post from NZ and I hope LP gave you back your Dirty Lovers VHS before we left the country. If not you can come visit us and I will return it to you.
Love Marshy xx
wow marshy i'm stoked to be the recipient of your first post!
see that's the problem with lending stuff to people, you totally forgot you lent it to them. i'll be there post haste. thanks!
awesome. bed n a beer waiting for ya xx
I'll do ya another copy Rigid if ya lost it - now on dvd too!!
holy shit dvd!
this is the sarah sands video right marshall? right dirtylover?
one with interviews early gigs, single launch gig etc - I sent it to ya ages ago Rigid
yep, i know the one, i've still got that. i lent marshall the sarah sands vhs. all my stuff has been in storage so long i've kinda lost track of what i actually own.
I generally won't lend stuff, unless it's to people I really like. That said, I never forget.
I do currently have Timey's Kevin Sheedy book written by Tim Watson.....
I once lent a hugely personally important casette tape recording of the first gig of the first serious band I was ever in to one of the other guys in the band - this was probably 15 years after we broke up - and he lost it. I was devastated and will never forget it.
i like that this thread has reminded everyone of whose stuff they have in their possession.
I had a friend lend me the exact same thing. I lost it. Such a weird feeling.
A friend of mine accused me of stealing her books. When she visited late last year, she scoured my bookshelf, only to find my excellent library was entirely absent of her books.
I was pretty chuffed.
Some friend if she accuses you of stealing.
A charming young man I used to date still has my treasured copies of London Fields and Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, and he always brings it up whenever I see him (which is somewhat infrequently) so I don't really think he's trying to get away with keeping them, we're both just too slack to organise the handover. Maybe I should ask him to post them to me.
i'll gladly pay you wed for a hamburger today
i'm not sure if she's convinced too! but she lets me stay at her house in melbourne, so i'll put up with it.
i'm hopeless i always forget to give stuff back.
hmmm, what about when someone pushes , nay insists that you borrow something and you take it and it sits on your shelves for a few years and you'd like to take it back but then you'd have to admit you didn't read it.
And what about when someone really close to you, insists you borrow a book that you do not take because you are not interested in said subject. A year later, you borrow her other book on said subject but not the one she originally tried to lend you.
A year later, you've apparently lost the original book.
Even though, a long long search of books on shelves and in boxes still fails to find it.
aah, the flawed memory of lending.
dear friend's brother's lawyer ex-flatmate,
you should be finished that orwell omnibus by now. it's only been about three years. i still miss it. and the brother's still embarrassed about it.
ta.