TagoMago

yeah well it was meant to be an offensive insult, i was pretty furious after he partly put me in that fucked up situation. love the guy, but he's a fucking prick and a fuckup.

i used to walk from work from a music venue at the top end of bourk street to port melbourne via flinders street a few nights a week for almost 2 years anytime from 11pm to 4am and never had a single problem. been living in bogota, colombia for 6 months now and melbourne is like happy happy joyland by comparison. travelled through asia, africa, middle east, north america and never been closed to beinf robbed, mugged, yet after monday nights incident my personal count is now at 4 whilst being here. place is like mad max during the day and dawn of the dead by night. even my girlfriend (colombian) refuses to walk alone after 6pm because she considers it ''fatal.'' anyway heres an excerpt of the email i sent my friend describing the latest incident (previously mugged at knife point, but the guy was a pro and it was over in seconds, and pick pockeded twice by profesional thieves and a transexual who grabbed my nuts for distraction)

''ive also been hanging out with this special guy, milind, from india. I met him about 8 weeks ago when I was back in a hostel, the guy is 33 years old and his mum sends him 4 grand every month to fund his cocaine and whore habit. he´d been kicked out of one hostel for breaking a window and stalking a girl there, then he got kicked out of this one because he had no money to pay his bill. he never slept, spent the whole day night drinking, mixing rum with wine, the last time I saw him there he was drunk, crying and begging people for money to pay his bill ($200 in 4 days) the next morning I was told that he got escorted out by the police and left his ´clothes´as deposit. about one month passes, and im walking down the street and theres indian looking dude asleep on a chair at 1am in the street, I slap him on the back, he looks up and its the same fucking guy! living on the streets for 4 weeks, waiting for his mother to send him money! the dude smells like stray dogshit man, only eats bread and coffee, says his plan if his mum doesn't send him money is to ´make cookies and sell them then go to norway´... brilliant no?

so I visit this guy every second night, give him a sandwich and ask him about how he came to be such an eternal fuckup. says he spent 7 grand in one month alone in Medellin, on whores and coke, said one whore let him drink milk from her tits. anyway, so last night I pay my visit, and its a holiday so everything is closed, so we have to walk down about 10 blocks to a pretty dodgy area to find something to eat, I find a bakery and some coffee, and we get the usual hassle from the bums, who are generally pretty chill if you just be polite with them, but then one bum becomes two, then three, then four, and before I know it we´re surrounded by this gang of desperate rat like bums, 4 of which then decide asking for money isn't going to work and so gang tackle me into the side of a shop, and start tearing at my pockets and clothes like vultures man, totally unexpected, and all I could think was if I get stuck on the ground I am fucked´ didn't know if they had knives or what, so I throw my coffee into one guys face, manage to scramble to my feet, and then just begin screaming at these guys and waving my fists like a mad ape going ¨VEN QUI MOTHERFUCKER!!¨trying to intimidate them and create attention, which sort of works and gives me enough space to be able to walk off, but milind the curry munching prick is frozen in place and refuses to move, saying ïll wait for a cab (what a genius)¨so im walking off, and next thing I hear his this guy screaming like an animal, and I turn around and the bums have him on the ground tearing his clothes, shoes off, and hes screaming at me ¨come back!¨so I pick up a pane of broken glass on the sidewalk, hold it over my head and start running at these guys screaming ¨FUCK YOUUUUUU!! FUCK!!!!!!¨ and they get spooked and crawl off, even leaving milinds jacket because it smelled so bad. extremely uncomfortable experience. like a bad dream. as we´re walking back milind the cunt reminds me that about 10 minutes prior to getting attacked I bragged that ï could probably kill at least 10 people just using my cock alone¨ I tell him to go suck dick for money then go to back to my house to find that ive been locked out.

all in all, they got the equivalent of $2 from us (mil has no money of course) for all that effort. today I bought a Stanley Knife and got a gym membership. mean streets man''

the latest thing at the moment going around is this nasty drug called 'escopolamina' that more or less induces you into a zombie like state for hours a time willingly doing anything thats asked of you leaving you without a single memory of the events. its often used to rape women and retrieve atm funds or home goods. method of transfer is simple, in drinks, or on cigarettes but the most comon is paper; someone will have directions or a map, ask you to look at it, then blow it in your face and thats the last thing you'll remember. scary shit.

that said, i love living here and plan to buy an apartment next year. so expect more of these stories i guess.

ha, the highlight of that was 'wish you well' not making the top hundred and some unknown dross shit by the kooks making it.

wonderwall as no1 and 3 songs by the killers? dreadful effort that.

bat him at three then? i rate his defense above warner or hughes. this odi team is rabble.

his bowling form didnt look too bad. alistair cook is the worst non bowler ive seen. bowls these massive loopy offbreaks that take 20 minutes to reach the batsman.

anyway, michael clarke should heed this article http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/blog/2013/may/23/20-great-ashes-moments-1989?mobile-redirect=false

why is warner popular with the australian public? is it becaus he makes runs in the ipl/big bash and nowhere else? displays the similar boorish behaviour of warne minus the none of the cricketing genius. do we relate better to talentless bogans?

i think kiwis will struggle to get 200 second time around. will need bogan mcullum to play a blinder.

i thought that was tim paine? at least warners in the team, though for how mich longer im not sure. wade or cowan seem the next likeliest choices, though not if they keep getting dropped for 35 year olds.

i remember the cocteau twins 'blue bell knoll' made the hottest 100 in 89 or someshit. unthinkable now. what an infinitely shitter radio world we live in.

flag pole sitta